guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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