i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize