Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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