turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
