This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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