420 ftw
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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