Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
