so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
