I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize