Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
