Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
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She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Are we still banned from the library?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
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you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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