tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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