at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
