Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
