I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize