where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
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