I wanna bring you to show and tell
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
