I cockslap morals
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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