just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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