I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?