Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?