Texts From Last Night

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  (302): View more from Delaware

  some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period

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  (302): some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period http://tfl.nu/2c6q
  Replies (33) Good night (2619) Bad night (1207)
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  (896): View more from

  i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.

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  (896): i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself. http://tfl.nu/abgv
  Replies (9) Good night (3492) Bad night (918)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Not even the dog will look at me anymore.

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  (301): Not even the dog will look at me anymore. http://tfl.nu/6y6q
  Replies (15) Good night (1107) Bad night (4549)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..

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  (781): You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet.. http://tfl.nu/rd8s
  Replies (4) Good night (2525) Bad night (1388)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.

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  (515): Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake. http://tfl.nu/j6cx
  Replies (3) Good night (2652) Bad night (1148)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.

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  (269): I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax. http://tfl.nu/b5v2
  Replies (5) Good night (2670) Bad night (672)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.

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  (432): I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line. http://tfl.nu/q8nl
  Replies (20) Good night (4622) Bad night (996)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1

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  (231): I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1 http://tfl.nu/tow3
  Replies (7) Good night (1243) Bad night (887)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  Tornado booty call.. dedication

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  (469): Tornado booty call.. dedication http://tfl.nu/xoaj
  Replies (6) Good night (1070) Bad night (682)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA

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  (214): IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA http://tfl.nu/ecmd
  Replies (16) Good night (849) Bad night (979)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.

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  (419): So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall. http://tfl.nu/czve
  Replies (4) Good night (1003) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.

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  (617): The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight. (1-617): Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it. http://tfl.nu/ikoi
  Replies (7) Good night (1786) Bad night (440)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!

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  (308): Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable! http://tfl.nu/qvqx
  Replies (6) Good night (889) Bad night (340)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.

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  (574): Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time. http://tfl.nu/00ef
  Replies (2) Good night (498) Bad night (356)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.

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  (952): I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press. http://tfl.nu/04mj
  Replies (1) Good night (304) Bad night (507)

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