Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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