I want to walk on stilts...naked
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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