I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour