If i could tip my vagina, i would.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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