My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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