i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
