I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You took a bar mat shot.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
