this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
