I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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