Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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