I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
