As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize