No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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