direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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