tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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