I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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