i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm getting married
To pizza
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Damn victory sex feels great
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize