What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
