Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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