I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
