I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
