just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I need to calm my uterus...
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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