P.S. I can't hear my feet
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
