everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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