At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
