how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
