That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
