He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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