Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
No subtext here. People are naked.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
