My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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