So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
