You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize