you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm passing your future prison.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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