Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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